I am one who is powerless, for whom the world is hard and cold. I am one who feels hunted, and I hide to remain undetected. Being invisible is my survival.
What is your gift or message for me?
Invisibility was a valuable strategy when you were a child. The world was frightening and you were not in control. You survived by disappearing but at some point you also hid yourself from your own self.
What do you want me to do?
Remember me and let this part of you be a source for compassion. Yet make room for other parts of yourself.
Why did you show up today?
You are in a place of experiencing a lot of "young stuff" emerging from your soul. It's part of healing.
If you have a shadow, what would it be? Or, what light do you offer?
My name is Self (or Me-myself And I). Today I feel like a held breath waiting in the throat. Sometimes I am a work of art. Sometimes I am a tangled mess. But always I am curious. I ask the world, “How did I waste so much time?” And the answer is
Isn’t it enough to feel a chill as you rise from a warm bed, stumble to the bath and with nimble fingers attend to your body’s needs, button your shirt, to balance as you put pants on one leg at a time?
Isn’t it enough to hear the morning news, the coffee maker gurgling as you eat your Wheaties with skim milk, to listen in the comfort and illuminated safety of your kitchen as rain rattles the roof?
Isn’t it enough to inhale the earth’s perfume of wet dirt, worms, roses and jasmine blooms, to smell even the faint fumes of the world’s morning commute as you join with humanity for the day’s business?
Isn’t it enough to taste the fresh tender day and savor the strong bitter brew from your steaming paper chalice as you await the train under the shelter
with others huddled like pigeons?
Isn’t it enough to observe the blur of cinderblock fortresses adorned with graffiti, the lonely artifacts of life strewn across anonymous backyards, to notice the window cat watching the morning?
I am one who, though small, takes risks. I brave challenges of cold and dark to reach a distant goal. I am unfettered by trappings. I am fresh and curious. I will find a way.
What is your gift or message for me?
This baby is doing the improbable, using intelligence to find solutions to get closer to her goal. Even though you feel small and vulnerable like an infant, you have the ingenuity to design options.
What do you want me to do?
Use what is at hand to solve challenges. Use tools that may be unusual choices.
Why did you show up today?
I felt you needed a visual reminder of how brave and intrepid you are.
If you have a shadow, what would it be? Or, what light do you offer?
You stepped into the room And I knew I was doomed to fall for you The moment I saw you smile Now everywhere you go My eyes follow close And I am just waiting for the time to be right To tell you how I've loved you for awhile Oh my heart is going wild
You wear me down Like where the sea meets earth I fade away Just like the rocks have worn Don't you see what you do to me
You keep crashing Keep crashing into me I keep turning Turning out to be Something more Than what I was before
Your skin touched my skin And could feel that the breaking of my stone
cold heart was about to begin The moment that we locked eyes And now everywhere you go my eyes follow close And I am just waiting for the time to be right To tell you how I've loved you for awhile Oh my heart is going wild
You wear me down Like where the sea meets earth I fade away Just like the rocks have worn Don't you see what you do to me
You keep crashing Keep crashing into me I keep turning Turning out to be Something more Than what I was before
You wear me down Like where the sea meets earth I fade away Just like the rocks have worn Don't you see what you do to me
You keep crashing Keep crashing into me I keep turning Turning out to be Something more Than what I was before
I am one who practices non-distracted awareness when life storms around me. I am one who sometimes manages to release her head in order to be in big mind. I am one who breathes Presence. I am one who needs a teacher.
What is your gift or message for me?
The connection is within you. Practice opens the path. There is more to you than mind. Pay attention and wake up!
What do you want me to do?
Sit regularly. Sit some more. Sit, sit, sit. Just sit.
Why did you show up today?
Because you showed up.
If you have a shadow, what would it be? Or, what light do you offer?
The shadow is being seduced by ego into thinking about what my practice is doing, focusing on measuring, comparing, projecting progress. Light: the secret is within you and is always present and accessible.
I am one who is stronger than I appear. I am one who labors through time and perseveres. I am one who likes to be seen and feels seen for enduring, and who stands in light.
What is your gift or message for me?
There is power in small things and incremental movement.
What do you want me to do?
Do what needs doing that is in front of you, and remain open.
Why did you show up today?
As you listen to intuition, you are moving mountains of energy.
If you have a shadow, what would it be? Or, what light do you offer?
Time to let go Passing fingertips on my hand Can you prise yourself away from my eyes? And head for warmer plains? I’m so stagnant With a fear of jumping in the water The transitioning from hot to icy It’s pleasant when you get in
Every little thing I try Makes me realise It’s hard to untie Ever letting go With grace Every time I do It falls back into place Every little thing I try Makes me realise It’s hard to untie Ever letting go With grace Every time I do You have that look on your face
You float like a feather It’s too good to be true And you change like the weather The storm has to break through
Moving closer River flowing to the harbour Flowers sway in nature’s ballet Feeling everything There’s no end game But sometimes I am getting restless And I think I need a place to call home Finding it within
Every little thing Makes me realise Never letting go Every time I do
Can you teach me how to be a nomad I wanna be like I wanna be like you Can you teach me how to migrate I wanna move like I wanna move like you To warmer weather Next year Take me with you Take me with you
Take me with you Take me with you Take me with you Take me with you
"My point is that we are obligated to create the social world we want. Intimacy, togetherness—the opposite of the crushing loneliness so many people seem to feel—are what parties alchemize. Warm rooms on cold nights, so many people you love thumbtacked down in the same place, the musical clank of bottles in the recycling, someone staying late to help with the dishes—these are things anyone can have, but like everything worth having, they require effort. Fire trucks, after all, don’t come from nowhere—they come because we pay taxes.
This
year, pay your taxes: Resolve to throw two parties—two because two
feels manageable, and chain-letter math dictates that if every party has
at least 10 guests (anything less is not a party!) and everyone
observes host-guest reciprocity (anything else is sociopathic!), then
everyone gets 20 party invitations a year—possibly many more. Bear in
mind that parties can be whatever you want: a 15-person Super Bowl
party; a casual picnic in the park with 20 of your pals; an overfull
house party, guest count unknown. They do not need to be expensive, or
formal, or in your own home. You don’t need a theme, unless you want
one. You don’t even need to buy anything, or clean up beforehand, if
you’re feeling particularly punk. All you have to do is invite people
in."
"Those choices might seem minor, but they matter: To call a friend, or scroll on Instagram? To go to church, the weekly soccer game, or book club—or sleep in and scroll again? Today’s newsletter rounds up stories on the activities that bring us together, and the ones that keep us apart."
You are in a wasteland With your soul trapped between the tides Running with wild horses and the wolves are on your track Hiding from the secrets in your eyes Hold my hand against the night Show me all the demons left to fight And I'll patch up the hole in your heart And carry on whistling in the dark And carry on whistling in the dark Twilight And the mud begins to crack You cross your fingers twice behind your back But your feet start to slip You stumble and you trip The sky breaks and the clouds are dripping black Hold my hand against the night Show me all the demons left to fight And I'll patch up the hole in your heart And carry on whistling in the dark And carry on whistling in the dark (Ahhh-ahhh-ahhhh-----ahhhhhh) Go now To the clear skies Where the tears will wash the color From your eyes Oh-ahh ahh-ahhhh-----ahhhhhh Ohh-ahh ah-ahhh ahh Ahhhh-h-h-h-h I will carry you home You know I've done it alone I will carry you home You know I've done it alone Hold my hand against the night Show me all the demons left to fight And I'll patch up the hole in your heart And carry on whistling in the dark In the dark Carry on whistling in the dark
We are not all left standing when the war has ended. It feels like the end times. For many, it is. Inhalation is our first act of embodiment. Exhalation, our last. One lifetime, millions of breaths a conversation with all existence. Where does the spirit go when we die? Hail Mary, my gentle Momma, You left; you gave up your breath before the virus could steal it. You waged a long campaign to stave off cancer, old age, and death. Emancipating your breath you added the gift of your spirit to all. Holy Mary, you released your body, returned to Earth, our suffocated Mother, in respiratory distress for decades. Humanity is a virus choking and drowning our source of life. When the host dies, the virus dies too. Momma, you returned to our Mother so you could garden with Her, to try to heal us all.
–Kathryn Harper
On this day six years ago my mother, Mary Catherine Nicklas Petro, died. She was 86 and had two types of cancer. In 2017 she was diagnosed with stage IV melanoma -- her third experience with melanoma. She began Opdivo, an immunotherapy. It was her good fortune that she fell into the 30% for whom the treatment worked. It shrank her tumors to almost nothing. About a year ago, her breast cancer returned. She had a lot of arthritis, mobility issues, and pain. Yet she kept going as long as she could with the Opdivo, because she wanted to contribute to the research on the treatment for the sake of others. The breast cancer returned, though, and she knew she didn’t want aggressive treatment for it. Her body was struggling enough with side effects and ailments.
Mom was getting close to entering hospice. We had imagined more time, a gradual decline, a process where we could see her again and say good-bye. Something happened inside her that day that led to a swift end. She is no longer suffering. I had talked to her three days prior, and I am so glad I did. We lived 3,000 miles apart. I lived in an epicenter of Covid-19, was sheltering-in-place, and am in a vulnerable group. I didn’t want to get it, and I didn’t want to carry it to my siblings or my elderly father. I spent a lot of time saying good-bye to my mother over the years, connecting with her, resolving things between us. I grieved some. Yet nothing prepared me for how that felt. The finality. May we all be peace; may we all be free from suffering.
I am one who would rather be reading than cleaning. I am one who is comfortable living with a certain level of dust and grime in order to attend to what interests me. I am one who would rather be somewhere else when cleaning.
What is your gift or message for me?
It's all right to ask for help at home from other family members. It's okay to let chores slide.
What do you want me to do?
Let go of guilt. Be present when you do these mundane chores. Teach Claire good habits.
Why did you show up today?
Because you are here at a SoulCollage® session instead of doing chores.
If you have a shadow, what would it be? Or, what light do you offer?
Oh dear, oh dear, I'm sorry That you grew up so soon A cold year and no high school parties I've been drinking alone Oh, I've been drinking alone
So, don't fear, don't fear their warnings They're bitterer than most Four years of driving across the country For empty seats at their shows And they've been drinking alone
So, keep your time, keep your mind, keep humble Start your life in the middle of the jungle You Young blood
Rub your eyes, be surprised, keep hungry Stay alive, try to lose all of your money You Young blood You Young blood Young blood
So when you're mad for no reason At everything at once And when you start over-thinking I'll be drinking at home Oh, I'll be drinking at home
So, keep your time, keep your mind, keep humble Start your life in the middle of the jungle You Young blood
Rub your eyes, be surprised, keep hungry Stay alive, try to lose all of your money You Young blood You Young blood Young blood
And if you want I could tell the truth That this life takes a toll on you I spend nights stitching up the loose threads of my soul And in the morning I'm bullet proof
And if you want I could tell the truth That this life takes a toll on you I spend nights stitching up the loose threads of my soul And in the morning I'm bullet proof In the morning I'm bullet proof
So, keep your time, keep your mind, keep humble Start your life in the middle of the jungle You Young blood
Rub your eyes, be surprised, keep hungry Stay alive, try to lose all of your money You Young blood You Young blood You Young blood Young blood
Iam one who is intensely focused. I seek clues and meaning. I persevere. I am one who practices attention through my eyes and through my mind.
What is your gift or message for me?
That being a seeker is only one part of who you are.
What do you want me to do?
Live in your body and all your senses.
Why did you show up today?
I have shown up today because you have noticed concerning lapses in memory. So this is a worry. I want to remind you that attention and retention aren't the same.
If you have a shadow, what would it be? Or, what light do you offer?
The shadow is the addiction to pursuit and perceiving with the eye to the exclusion of the other senses.
